Jump and Run - The Horrors of The Male Physical! by Ed Williams

Jump and Run - The Horrors of The Male Physical! by Ed Williams

For all you ladies out there, if you want to know one of the things we men fear most, its physicals.

Yes, yall heard me right, physicals. The yearly physical. Since Im closing in on fifty like an all-you-can-eat buffet diner closes in on the soft serve, its time for me to start getting yearly physicals. And with that in mind, I went ahead and got one today, and I survived it, but its no walk through the roses, let me tell you for sure. Other than a vasectomy, theres nothing that pushes the humiliation envelope higher up for men than a complete physical does. In order for all you ladies to better understand our fears, and in the hope of gaining sympathy for men everywhere, this week were gonna take the components of the male physical, lay them all out for yall to see, and then discuss them. After we do that you ladies will better understand our reluctance to get one. As an upfront word of caution, most of you men out there will wince at some of these items, but I think its important that you ladies have this once in a lifetime enlightenment opportunity. So, with all that being said, here are the major components of the male physical:

The Weigh-In - If youve recently been hitting the Krispy Kremes pretty hard, this is not a good item to begin with. What makes it all the worse is that the scale the doctor typically uses almost always has a big face with large numbers on it, and it is not uncommon for the nurse to weigh you and say, right out loud, Looks like two hundred and thirty pounds for you, honey. If you happen to only be five foot five, this can be a tad embarrassing.

The Urine Specimen - Nothings all that bad about this per se, except for the fact that youre not allowed to drink coffee right before the physical which means that all you can have is water that morning. Its murder on our caffeine addicted bodies, but we have to do it, and it does psychologically prepare us for some of the other sweet experiences coming up...experiences like...

The Interrogation- At this point, your physician approaches you, greets you warmly, and then asks if any of your family members happen to be bed wetters or serial droolers. The ostensible purpose of this is for you to let your doctor know your familys medical history so that he can treat you better, but its still pretty harrowing. If nothing else, it sets you up for the next tender experience, which is...

Hammer Time - For some unknown reason, at this point your doctor will hit you with a hammer all over your knees and ankles. With a metal hammer, I might add. The reason hell give you for doing this is that hes checking your reflexes, but I think its really done in order to provide a few moments of laughter for the doctor. Nothing like some humour to settle him down before the big three components of the physical, its true main events, which happen to be:

Checking the man out for a hernia.

Checking the man out for prostate problems.

Drawing blood to run a bunch of other tests.

Modesty forbids me describing any of these items in great detail, especially the first and second ones, but Ill bet a hundred dollars to a doughnut that most of you men out there who are reading this are suppressing any urge that you might have to cough, and Ill also bet that your legs are crossed tighter than Jack Benny. These parts of the male physical experience are enough to make you reflect on whether or not you might want to consider taking your chances with the diseases or problems that cause these personal inspections. Frankly, Id rather cut my lawn with my teeth than have to endure them, and just thinking about what all goes on is making my legs hurt as I type this.

So ladies, there you have it, the scoop on one of the males greatest fears, the yearly physical. And please dont give us any static about the demands of giving birth in order to counterbalance this. All of us men appreciate the fact that having kids is a rough, gritty business, but at least you ladies are physically designed to somehow get through it. We men, on the other hand, are ill equipped to deal with some of the invasive horrors inherent in our yearly physicals. And now, as abrupt as it may seem, I have to go as I need to shut down my computer before someone female comes in and reads these last few lines...

About the Author
Eds latest book, Rough As A Cob, can be ordered by calling River City Publishing toll-free at: 877-408-7078. Hes also a popular after dinner speaker, and his column runs in a number of Southeastern publications. You can contact him via email at: ed3@ed-williams.com, or through his web site address at: www.ed-williams.com.

Walking for Your Health by J. Raizel

Walking for Your Health by J. Raizel

Walking is the easiest way of exercise because it is accessible at anyplace, anywhere and anytime. Several studies show that walking can:

reduce high cholesterol and improve blood lipid profile
reduce body fat
enhance mental well being
increase bone density, hence helping to prevent osteoporosis
reduce the risk of cancer of the colon
reduce the risk of non insulin dependant diabetes
help to control body weight
help osteoarthritis
help flexibility and co-ordination hence reducing the risk of falls

Although walking can reduce body fat for weight loss purpose, it is actually not an effective option of exercise, because it doesnt burn lots of calories and only bring small increase in metabolism. In fact, you will have to walk for hours everyday if you want to burn fat! High intensity cardiovascular or aerobic exercise 2-3 times a week will be much more effective in burning off the excess body fat or losing weight.

Walking is more effective if maintaining or controlling your body weight. Walking at a faster pace can help improving cardiovascular function and fitness level, while walking at a slower pace can help building up endurance because of longer exercise time. In this case, speed and distance does matter. The faster and the further a person walks, the more calories he will use. So, what to do now? Depends on your goals, if you want to lose weight and love walking, you can combine them together in your exercise schedule, 2-3 times a week for high intensity cardio or aerobic exercise and 2-3 times a week walking with your family, and make sure be free one or two days. If you want to reduce risk of diseases or maintaining body weight / health, walking 2-3 times a week will help.

About the Author
For more information about beauty, health and fitness,
please visit Beauty, Health and Fitness
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Protein or Carbohydrates? by Jeffrey Bedeaux

Protein or Carbohydrates? by Jeffrey Bedeaux

This has got to be the biggest controversy in modern bodybuilding. Bodybuilders will say you've got to consume loads of protein to pack on quality muscle mass and increase strength. Nutrition experts say that you must eat a high carbohydrate diet, particularly complex carbs, to improve strength and size, and say that a high protein is of no benefit.

Who is right? You could say both are right. Only a few studies have been carried out looking into high protein intake and improvements in strength and muscle size. The results are inconclusive. Study design was poor, often only having very few subjects, who may be over-training or under-training. Other aspects of diet were often overlooked and most were only carried out on novice weight trainers who may not know how to train correctly. Also, the topic of anabolic steroids is avoided which does increase demand for protein.

Protein

Muscle consists mainly of two proteins, actin and myosin. The turnover rate of amino acids in these proteins is high, and increases upon stimulation such as exercise. If the muscle is worked to maximum effort like during a correctly executed bodybuilding workout, turnover is extremely high. Hence, there is a large demand from the body's pool of amino acids. High carb fans say this demand can be met by only a moderately higher than normal protein intake. High protein fans argue very high levels of protein are needed to meet demand. Bodybuilders who have plateaued in their gains for long periods, have dramatically increased their protein intake and started making gains. Also anabolic steroids increase the rate of protein synthesis within muscle cells, further increasing demand for protein.

Carbohydrate

The argument for a high carb intake comes from the fact that we need energy to fuel our workouts and to recuperate and grow. This is certainly the case for athletes who may need as much as 60% of their energy intake from carbs. High carb advocates also say that a normal intake of high protein foods should be eaten, as starchy carbohydrate foods also contain some protein, which will increase protein intake sufficiently. The type of carbs that should be consumed is high fiber starchy ones like whole meal bread, brown rice, whole wheat breakfast cereals, etc.

Using Both Protein and Carbs

Dietitians and nutritionists too often look at the percentage of total energy intake for proteins and carbohydrates. It would be better to look at actual intake levels. Both protein and carbs are needed in high amounts in order to gain muscle for all the reasons discussed above.

The problem in giving general advice is that we are individuals and therefore our requirements for different nutrients vary. If you are trying to gain muscle at the same time as trying to lose body fat, your carbohydrate intake will need to be reduced. If you are a beginner bodybuilder who is very skinny, your protein intake will need to be high and you will need to consume high carb foods regularly to gain weight.

Remember, you will not make good gains unless your protein intake is sufficient. Any successful bodybuilder will tell you this, no matter what so-called experts say and clinical trials show. A reasonably high intake of quality carbs is also required to train on and for recuperation. Eat complex carbs regularly throughout the day.

It is hard to give you figures of how much is required, as we are all so different. But as a general rule for any bodybuilder who is trying to gain muscle size and strength and does not wish to gain bodyfat, the following would be a good guide:

Protein: 1.0-1.5g of protein per pound bodyweight, depending on whether you use anabolic steroids. The intake must be staggered throughout the day at regular intervals.

Carbohydrate: Approximately 2g per pound bodyweight, and eat regularly through the day. As well as the above, remember to eat a balanced healthy diet, which is reasonably low in fat and high in fruit and vegetables.

About the Author
Jeff Bedeaux
Your guide to building muscle and getting fit.
http://www.dr-natural-bodybuilding.com

Over the past 16 years I have read 100s of magazines, almost 100 books, attended about a dozen seminars and consumed any other type of information on the topic of bodybuilding to advance my knowledge in this area. I also have a Bachelors of Science degree in Biochemistry from Colorado State University, 1998.